Self-Love from the Mother Within
By: Candice Frazier, Certified Health & Lifestyle Coach, Medical Assistant & Sensuality Coach
While motherhood is touted as this wonderful thing, it can also be a very stressful, chaotic and confusing place.
And while some mothers long to be a mother, there are other mothers who confusingly find themselves longing to have back the peace and solitude of life before becoming a mother.
They have all these sweet memes talking about how awesome it is to be a mother. In contrast, there really is never a discussion on darker side of it. The sense of being unappreciated and unimportant can take its toll on a mother. This is even more so if she is giving all her time and energy to the care and well-being of her family but neglecting sweet love and kindness for herself.
I believe that there is much healing power in the act of mothering ourselves. I have personally experienced healing from giving that caregiving energy to myself. It had an added benefit of removing that deep-rooted need of my family to appreciate me, of needing something outside of me to feel whole, of looking for external factors to feel complete and important. It lessened and eventually dissipated the chaos, despair and sadness that can accompany the unmet expectations of motherhood.
There is a bigger picture of this mothering role/concept. If we look at this a bit deeper, from the perspective of inside each of us is a mother and father…yes… inside each one of us! The reason it is called “self-love”, is because you love yourself. Therefore, it cannot be called “love everybody else and give nothing to self”.
I operate from a place of “love me first, fill my cup first,” unapologetically, and without guilt or shame. I can’t be my best me if I’m giving away all of me to everybody else.
As mothers, (and even some fathers), we may find it hard to be selfish, often we were taught we must put our children first, from a sense of duty or even societal programming. But this is not true! We must make self-care & self-love a priority, not only be our best, but because they are watching us. When we give ourselves permission to do that, we are mothering ourselves from within.
Self-love through self-care is the ultimate expression of love from within. This is essential as you cannot give to another… not a child not a partner not a friend not a family member, what you are failing to give yourself. It is through the daily acts of kindness of self-care and self-love that creates the key to unlock the door to your internal and external happiness.
How Do Mother Myself From Within?
So this Mother’s Day, I encourage and challenge you to take baby steps to grow in your self love and mothering from within using these steps as guidelines.
Top 5 Steps To Mother Yourself From Within
Take a few minutes each morning to look at yourself in the mirror (male & female). As you gaze lovingly at yourself, shower declarations of love, appreciation and admiration for self. Each morning stand in the mirror and tell yourself “I love you. I appreciate you. I admire you. I believe in you. I trust you. You are safe. You’ve got this!” This will build your self-love, self-esteem and self-confidence, sense of safety and connection through internal validation.
Move your Body in ways that make you happy and exhilarate you, even something as simple as stretching can be beneficial. Movement works to increase the feel-good chemicals in your body naturally, so you do not have to use substances. The idea here is to be holistic and love self from within.
Find people who you enjoy spending time with. Sometimes family can be just another “F” word and if you are alone on holiday’s, I know how difficult and lonely that can feel. The beauty of self-love is knowing that you have the power to choose how you seek connection. You may connect with your biological family or your connection may come with your friends. You get to choose.
Meditation is the quiet you will come to seek daily as the blessing to go inward and connect to inner mother, inner father and fully embrace you as you are. Here is where you will find your intuition as it guides you through the practice of tuning into self. Meditation and breathing are both beneficial for triggering the release of the calming and feel-good chemicals to be released into the body. This will provide a deep sense of love, gratitude and peace from within. This feeling is like a sweet cuddle for your inner child.
Fun, Fun, Fun…Lots of FUN! Part of mothering from within is play and imagination. Go to a park, the beach or wilderness and connect to mother earth and let your imagination come to life again as you revel in the sweet place of being a kid again.
For the next 30 days enjoy the reward and freedom that self-love and gratitude creates. I hope you enjoy the experience of feeling your healing mother’s love from within, just as my clients and I have. Enjoy the renewed energy, peace while finding self love and you will be able to share more love with others because you have more love to give within yourself.
Note: If you have a mother, don’t forget to call her. Tell her you understand she has done everything in her power to be the best mother she could, with what her abilities provided. Tell her you know everything she did for you, was an act of love or cry for love, and all had a positive intention, even if at the time it was painful and difficult.
What next? Get in Touch
If it’s your time to do things from an intentional space, then take action and contact me.
Let’s connect and learn more about how to transform your life.
In my practice, I teach how the simple basics of self-love through self-care opens the door to living an empowered and full life, free of fear and full of abundant joy, love and prosperity.
I like to offer my clients a complimentary discovery session before joining my program. This provides the opportunity to ask questions and learn more about my programs and my coaching philosophy.
To schedule your discovery session please call me 916-542-9853 or email me at email@example.com and mention “MOTHERME111”.
Don’t let years go by clinging to negative energy and having more of what you don’t desire and less of what you do desire.
Remember to LOVE SELF FIRST! Be the peace, patience & compassion the world needs more of.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Candice Frazier is a Certified Health/Life Coach, Sensuality Coach, former Certified Medical Assistant and an Air Force Veteran. She an Author Sensuality of Self Care (coming Spring 2019), Founder, Creator and Host of Awakened Sage Podcast, Wellness With Candice and Elite Care Coaching Consultants.
Implementing a holistic/alternative health approach, she overcame the adversity of childhood abuse & trauma, and is a 2x suicide survivor. She has overcome own health struggles of multiple autoimmune illnesses and debilitating fibromyalgia, and narcissistic abuse. Her A-HA moment came when she realized that all the disease and illness in her body, was it communicating to her that she was not in alignment with her truth and was ignoring her intuition.
After tuning into her intuition and allowing it to guide her in her daily actions, her new reality is now health, peace, happiness and connection to self. Her goal is to teach humanity how to be complete mind, body and spirit through reconnecting to love of self through sensuality of their self-care to create confidence, intimacy and prosperity.
Her passion is to share the knowledge that healing is possible. Her healing was not found in a pill or in doctor’s office. Her healing was right inside her all along, and with the help of her own Internal Guru, she can now enjoy a fuller life.